Dear Diary
by OldHaZel
Summary: An AH approach to what could have happened at the beginning. Complete for the time being; I might write more in the future.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is an AH – all the characters are human. So let's go back right to the start; Elena and Stefan have just started dating, Damon is just his annoying brother and Caroline is with Matt. Jeremy was dating Bonnie in the beginning, not Vicki, for the purpose if this story, but have now broke up.**

**...**

_**Dear Diary, (Fri 20**__**th**__** Jan)**_

_**The new history teacher started today. Now we are going to actually have to learn about history, this means saying goodbye to our lazy/ gossip period. Well I guess there is lunch. Silver lining: he is cute! Also, if I were keeping tabs on how many times I have gotten into trouble because if Care then I would definitely be approaching 20 – Elena too. Care is still yet to reach 1. Oh and of course I managed to make a fool out of myself twice; not making good first impressions today. **_

_**Not much to report in other areas =/ I didn't see Jeremy today –bonus! I decided not to go to Tyler's party the tomorrow; Jeremy is going - despite hating Tyler. I still don't even want to look at his face; I guess I'm not moving on as fast as I hoped. **_

**[Earlier that day...]**

"I'm your new history teacher." He smiles looking over the faces of his new audience.

When his eyes meet Bonnie's they seem to stay there a little bit longer than they have with anyone else, but Bonnie dismisses it as just being in her head. A small screwed up piece of paper lands on Bonnie's desk, she rolls her eyes smiling, knowing who is begging for her attention. She turns to face her bubbly blonde friend, Caroline sits one row over and one seat back, "_He's cute!" _she mouths approvingly. Bonnie nods and sticks up a thumb playing along with her friend's immaturity.

"Excuse me, Miss, you there, middle row third seat back."

Bonnie's eyes widen when she realises he is talking to her. She gives Caroline an unimpressed look then slowly turns back to face the front "Me?" she asks quietly.

"Yes. What's your name?"

"B..Bonnie."

"Bonnie, I promise you what I am saying really isn't that boring, so if you could please pay attention."

She nods "Sorry." She folds her arms and slouches in her chair. She looks over to Elena who is smiling, finding what just happened to be amusing.

When the bell rings to signal lunch and everybody leaves hurriedly. When Bonnie gets to the front of the class she is pulled aside by the calling of her name, nervous to realise it was Alaric.

"I'm sorry I called you out in front of everyone; it's just it's my first day and I need to show my authority before people think they can walk all over me. I didn't mean to embarrass you."

"Its fine" she smiles and backs away meeting her friends whom are waiting by the door.

Outside in the corridor the trio work their way through the crowd of people trying to stick together. "You totally want him." Is the first thing Caroline says, it's directed at Bonnie.

"Really, Caroline?" Elena says with a raised eyebrow.

"What?" she says genuinely missing the point in Elena's tone. They go outside for the quiet and fresh air and make themselves comfortable under the shade of a tree. "I was just making an observation, it was right there for anyone to see." The conversation had moved on, but Caroline couldn't resist bringing it back up. The pair looked at her confused. "Mr Saltzman..."

They both groan at her. "Will you drop it, Caroline? I do not like Mr Saltzman." She says it believingly but Caroline doesn't buy it.

"Look, there is it again, my observation, see?" She points at Bonnie's face. "You might want to tell your face to sell what you mouth is pitching...Ouch" Bonnie slaps her hand away.

"Hey, are you abusing my girlfriend?" Matt shouts walking towards them.

"She deserves it" Elena shouts back.

Caroline fake pouts leans into Matt when he sits next to her. He kisses the slapped hand and rubs it "Better?" she kisses him on the lips to say yes.

"Can I join you?" Stefan asks standing behind Elena.

"Of course you can." She pats the grass next to her.

Bonnie looks at the couples; they are all lovey-dovey and cute. She grabs her bag and stands wiping any grass from her bum. "I'm gonna go."

"What? Why?" Elena questions.

"I'm feeling like a fifth wheel. I'll be in the library if you want me."

"I'm sorry if we made you uncomfortable." Stefan says.

"No, you didn't." She walks off back into school.

The hallway is clear now with everyone either in the lunch room or outside. Bonnie walks through the corridor totally absorbed in a magazine she brought that morning. She pushes a door open with her elbow then let's is go to slam behind her. There is a thud and someone yells out in pain. She gasps and turns around quickly. Of course if it is anyone it has to be Mr Saltzman.

"I'm so sorry I didn't know you were behind me and I wasn't paying attention I would have held it if I had known I would have I'm so sorry, are you okay?" his ears can barely keep up with her.

"It's okay, just my foot; I only need it for walking." He bends his leg and rubs at his foot.

"Did I say I was sorry?" she panics feeling she is working her way into his bad books.

"Don't worry; I shouldn't have assumed you knew I was there." He looks at the magazine "But now I understand; Zac Efron can be very captivating."

She shrugs looking at the picture in the magazine "I'm a sucker for blue eyes." When she looks up she blushes seeing his eyes are blue too.

"I'll see you Monday, Bonnie." She doesn't get what he means "Class..."

"Right, of course, I knew what you meant." She is too embarrassed to look at him when he walks off. "He thinks you are totally stupid!" she says to herself.

He twists back around shocking Bonnie "Did you say something?"

"No, no...No" she tries to smile convincingly, but fails.

_**...**_

_**Dear Diary, (Sun 22**__**nd**__** Jan)**_

_**So I ended up going to Tyler's party after all; but only after a lot of convincing. It was okay, for about the first 30 minutes, that's when Jeremy arrived. He seems rather cocky lately and I wanna slap it out of him! He had some girl all over him all night, I don't know if he was rubbing it in on purpose or not but he was. Elena tried to distract me I couldn't help but look. I feel bad for her; I know how terrible she feels but her apologies can't make up for a lack of one from him. Before I could tolerate him but now I **__**hate **__**really don't like him!**_

_**P.s. History tomorrow = me freaking out!**_

_**...**_

_**Dear Diary, (Mon 23**__**rd**__** Jan) **_

_**Okay I have a plan, appropriately named: Avoid Alaric. (That's his first name by the way). Basically involves me not making eye contact and not speaking to him – unless in reply. I came up with it during history; I spent half my time cringing thinking about our previous encounters. I'm not sure how I am going to handle being in his class three times a week. I don't know why I can't stand to even look at him!**_

_**...**_

_**Dear Diary, (Mon 6**__**th**__** Feb) **_

_**Avoid Alaric is going well; I am successfully avoiding Alaric. I have also resorted to dodging him in the hallway. Although one time I did an abrupt left turn and flew straight into some guy making him drop is Coke – equals one pair of ruined shoes for me. =( **_

_**Today it hit me; I like him. That is why I find it so hard to be around him after embarrassing myself. I have a crush on my high school teacher. Cringe. The worst part was that Caroline was right. **_

_**...**_

_**Dear Diary, (Wed 8**__**th**__** Feb)**_

_**Oh my Gosh. Jeremy came up to me today. I was sitting perfectly fine by myself eating my lunch when he came from nowhere. He wanted to talk but I wasn't having any of it; I rightly stormed off. However he turned stalker and caught up with me at my locker. I could barely hear a word through my anger but I did manage to catch two. I'm sorry. He actually apologized. Still I kept face and stormed off - again. This time into the bathroom but he wasn't there when I came back out. Needless to say I couldn't stay focused in history to write any understandable notes. **_

_..._

_**Dear Diary, (Fri 10**__**th**__** Feb) **_

_**Didn't do too well on the avoiding Alaric today, wound up in a 45 minute detention through no fault of my own. It wasn't that bad; I tried the no eye contact and no speaking thing for as much as I could. I am however doing well on the avoiding Jeremy front – that being how I got into detention. Vicious circle much?...**_

**[Earlier that day...]**

Bonnie sits in class watching the pencil she is tapping on her desk move up and down. So far she has ignored all of Caroline's attempts and getting her attention. Half way through the lesson her phone vibrates on the table. Naturally she picks it up and reads it.

"_Bonnie, I understand why you are avoiding me. But please I want to apologize properly. Meet with me?" _she starts to get angry just by reading Jeremy's reads it again and again and she doesn't hear Alaric call her name.

"Bonnie!" he says for the third time. He is standing right next to her desk and it takes her a moment to realise what is happening. She quickly closes her phone and puts it in her pocket. He holds his hand out so she takes it back out and gives him the phone.

"I'll see you after school, Miss Bennett." He states casually walking back to front.

When the day finishes she stands beside his desk waiting for him to finish wiping the board clean. She can't help but take advantage of the positioning; she hasn't seen him this close before. Her eyes explore his back, starting at his shoulders she admires how broad they are. Further down she watches the muscles in his back move and she picks up on how toned they look. Finally his bum; perfect.

When he turns around she swiftly moves her eyes away. He brings a chair over and puts it next to his desk so she is to his right. They sit and he slides her some papers.

"I need some help marking these."

"Can you do that? I think I'm supposed to do my school work, not help you with yours."

"I know, but you are up to date with everything and there is no need for improvement on it. So unless you want to clean the windows or something."

She picks up a pen and starts reading. She is slouched in the chair and has an irritated demeanour about her. Alaric keeps looking at her but she doesn't notice.

"I hope it's not too inappropriate to ask but, are you mad at me or the guy on the phone?"

She thinks about her answer for a moment "Both."

"Did I do something?" She holds her hands out and looks around the room. "Right, the detention."

"People are always on their phones and you always pretend not to notice. But the one time I look at mine you keep me behind. I hate to say it but you obviously have something against me. Is it because of your foot, because you stopped limping ages ago?"

"Bonnie I don't have anything against you, I don't want you to think that." He moves his arm across the table and gently touches her hand. Her heart flutters and she tries to keep a straight face.

"That's what it looks like."

"If anything it's the total opposite. You are the only student, in any of my classes that I don't know anything about. You don't speak at all during class and you barely even look up."

"So this is an attempt at getting to know me?"

"I guess so. I find you kids respond better if I'm not the usual boring teacher."

"How did you know it was a guy on my phone?"

"The look on your face when you read it said it all." Her face becomes sad and she looks down to the desk. "Do you want to talk about it?"

She looks back up to him laughing a little "That would be extremely weird!"

"Well its one way of getting to know you. You can tell a lot about a girl by her ex."

"Really?"

"Sounds like it would be true. Come on, what's his name?"

She rolls her eyes and gives in "Jeremy Gilbert"

"I know him, Tuesday afternoons, last row five seats back."

She looks impressed "Do you know where everyone sits?"

"Not everyone, you like to move around a lot. You though, are always middle row, third seat back."

She nods "I get a good view."

**... **_**But I think I managed to redeem myself with Mr Saltzman; he is pretty cool. I guess in a way I should thank Jeremy, not that I will. I did agree to see Jer in the end, maybe he will leave me alone. Monday after school; I'm not going out my way to see him! **_

_**P.s. Mr Saltz has the best bum I have ever seen!**_

_..._

It's Monday afternoon; Bonnie is standing on the steps by the school entrance. She gets a message

'_I can't make it, Mr Saltz gave me detention for the whole week. Rain check?' _she groans and makes her way over to her car. When inside she calls Caroline.

"Hey, Care what you up to?"

"I'm at home, but we are going to Mystic Grill in a bit. You wanna come?"

"We?"

"Elena's with me now, we are meeting Stefan and Matt there."

"Okay, beats sitting at home."

"I'll pick you up. See you in thirty."

Back at home Bonnie is pushing her clothes back and forth along the rack. She wants to look cute; maybe she will meet a gut there and she won't have to be the fifth wheel anymore. She settles upon a pair of shorts, t-shirt and a leather jacket. She fixes her make-up and inspects her reflection; the shorts make her legs look long.

Caroline honks to inform of their arrival. Bonnie runs down the path; it had started to rain a little. They all have a good time, laughing, eating and playing some of the games there. After an hour and a half Bonnie decides she wants to leave. Maybe she would have stayed longer had there been some guys worthy of her attention.

"Do you want me to drop you off?" Caroline asks sipping her drink.

"No, you stay. I don't mind walking." She gives them all a hug good bye then heads for the door. She stands in the little foyer looking through the glass doors; the rain is coming down heavy now.

The noise from the restaurant spills into the little room when the inside door opens.

"You might be waiting a while."

She turns her head quickly in recognition of his voice. "Alaric. I mean Mr Saltz, Saltzman."

"I don't mind you calling me Alaric, Bonnie." He stands next to her, their arms almost touching.

"Is it supposed to last long?"

"Way into the night."

"Oh"

"Let me give you a ride."

"No, you don't have to, it's fine. I'll wait to see if it lightens up a little."

"Well I'm not leaving until you do, and then I will stalk you to make sure you get home safe." She laughs at him.

"Alright."

He opens the door "Ready?" she nods and they walk out. He puts his arm around her waist and tries to cover her a little with his jacket.

Inside the car she catches her breath and wipes some of the water off her face. He turns the heat up to the highest it will go to try and warm them up.

"How long were you in there?" she questions.

"About an hour."

"I'm surprised I didn't notice you, I don't know how I could have missed you."

"I saw you, you were with the blonde that talks too much."

"I don't notice how much she talks anymore; I guess I'm used to it."

"She deserves an award. I wonder how long she can hold her breath."

Bonnie chuckles, she might complain about her sometimes but those are the things that make Caroline, Caroline. There is a moment silence. Out the corner of his eye he discreetly looks her over paying special attention to her legs.

"You suck at pool by the way." He teases.

"Hey!" he playfully hits his bicep.

Jeremy comes to mind and she ponders whether to bring him up or not.

"Errm, Alaric."

"Yes?"

"Did you give Jeremy a week's detention... because of me?"

He briefly glances over to her. "Why do you think that?

"Well...you don't see him until Tuesday afternoon, which is tomorrow. So how could he have done anything to deserve detention from you; especially as you don't usually give them. And I did mention him last week."

"Now, Bonnie. It would be _very_ unprofessional of me to punish that boy on behalf of someone else." He looks at her and winks with a cheeky grin.

"I guess it is just my lucky day then."

They arrive at her house; she unbuckles her seatbelt and, without thinking, leans over and kisses his cheek. She pulls back quickly a little embarrassed. "Thank you" she squeaks then hops out the car and runs to her door. He watches her all the way until she closes the door behind herself then pulls off.

_**Dear Diary, (Mon 13**__**th**__** Feb)**_

_**The meeting with Jer didn't happen, to my relief. It's the reason why though, it has got me thinking. **__**Mr Saltz**__** Alaric gave him a week's worth of one hour detentions! That has to mean something, right? He cares? I know he cares about all his students, he's cool like that, but I am suspecting he actually cares for me, properly. Am I being crazy? Maybe he likes me! Okay now I'm being crazy. **_

_**I don't think I am going to be able to look at him the same now I have see rain droplets slowly run down his beautiful face. Or now that I have seen his wet shirt cling to his sculpted abs. Oh and the biceps...mmmm – says it all. Oh dear I'm drooling!**_

_**I even kissed him on the cheek; I can still feel his stubble on my lips - one embarrassing moment I don't regret. I hope I haven't made him uncomfortable now. I should apologize, gives me reason to talk to him again.**_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hey guys! I hope this was okay; it's nearly two in the morning here so my final proof read was barely practically pointless =/ But I did spell check! **

**More chapters coming soon; it was originally one long text but I decided to split it up. Let me know your thoughts. =) **


	2. Chapter 2

The next Wednesday when everyone is leaving to go home Bonnie purposely packs her things slowly so she can be the last one left in the classroom with him. She strolls up to his desk and clears her throat to get his attention.

He looks up a little surprised and glad to see it is her. "Bonnie." He smiles.

"Errm...I just thought I should apologize about what happened the other night."

He looks at her confused, not knowing what part she is referring to. "Me giving you a lift?"

"Me kissing you. I wasn't thinking, I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"It was just my cheek, Bonnie."

"I know, but I wasn't sure what you were thinking."

"Probably something along the lines of: what's a cheek kiss between two friends?"

"Friends?"

"Yea, we aren't just teacher and student anymore are we? Friends help each other out."

"In that case I owe you, twice."

"Twice?"

"The ride home and ..."

Someone entering the room stops her. "Jeremy" Alaric says then looks at Bonnie showing he understands the second one.

"I'll see you next class, Al...Mr Saltz." She walks towards the door, when she passes Jeremy he grabs her arm gently.

"I've been meaning to talk to you. Do you still want to meet another time?"

Alaric watches them carefully not understanding why he feels so protective.

"Don't bother, I accept your apology, let's leave it at that. Now you don't have to speak to me, nor I you." She snatches her arm away. Alaric tries to hide his smirk.

Walking out the door Bonnie hears Alaric ordering Jeremy to clean the windows and she walks of laughing.

...

_**Dear Diary, (Sat 3rd Mar)**_

_**I**__** can't believe how close me and Alaric have become, and so quickly. Except I only talk to him in school and the only other place I see him is at the Grill – but I know it makes him uneasy to speak to me in a non-school environment. There is one way around this, a loophole if you will, and I am taking full advantage of it. I start at 6! =D **_

Alaric sits at the bar reading some book. Bonnie watches him for a minute waiting for him to finish his glass. When he does she casually walks over and leans on the bar in front of him.

"Can I get you a refill?" she raises an eyebrow when he looks up at her. His expression makes her laugh.

"What...How...When?"

"Which one of those would you like me to answer?"

"What."

"I work here now, if it wasn't obvious." She points to her uniform.

"Why?"

"I figure you could use someone to make sure you don't go overboard on the Bourbon. And you might as well have some good company whilst you drink it." She smiles.

"Does this mean I get free refills?"

"Not if you want me to keep this job!"

_**Dear Diary, (Sun 1**__**st**__** Apr) **_

_**Alaric and I have settled into a routine I would say. Every day he comes into the bar, at least the days I work anyways. I swear every day I like him a little more. I just wish I could know what he is thinking...men! **_

_**...**_

Alaric is at the bar again, of course Bonnie is there too. She just about manages to do her job whilst giving Alaric her attention. Bonnie is leaning on the bar penetrating his personal space, as she feels she can now, when his tone turns serious.

"Bonnie, I need to talk to you...about class. You have really fallen behind in the last month."

"I guess, with the job and everything, I've put less effort into it."

"What are we going to do?"

"You could tutor me, so I can catch up."

"Or one of your friends can, I think that would be better."

"My friends don't know history from Citizenship. All offence to them, not your teaching. I'd much prefer your help." She strokes the back of his hand with her index finger and he gets lost watching the movement. He snaps out of it remembering to reply.

"Fine, I could teach you here. All the time we spend talking it makes sense to make use of it wisely." He moves his hand away from her touch. He finds it wrong that he likes it.

"It would be pretty impractical. I can't learn and pull drinks at the same time. Why don't we do it at your place?"

"Oh no I don't think that's a good idea." He shifts in his seat.

"Why not?"

"A teacher taking his student back to his apartment..."

"I thought you said we were friends." She pouts slightly. The look makes him feel bad so he agrees; after all he likes the idea anyway.

...

Bonnie knocks on the door to his apartment, excited and nervous. The first thing she notices when the door opens is that he is wearing a casual t-shirt; he has always been wearing a dress shirt whenever she has seen him before. The V neck allows her to see that he has hair on his chest. It drives her to lick her lips subconsciously. He invites her in. Drinks have some nibbles have already put out for them.

"I brought my book." She holds it out to prove it.

"That's good; we might need it after all."

They sit on the sofa and he talks about history, whereas she spends most of the time just starting at him. Over the next hour she slowly moves closer and closer to him, so slowly he doesn't notice. Their legs are touching, at the knee and up the thigh, not quite at the hip.

He finishes reading a paragraph and looks to her "Do you understand?" he moves his upper body back a little in surprise; he finally realises how close they are.

"Mhmm" she smiles, not even really paying attention to the question.

She takes the last sip from the can and leans forward to put it on the table, when she comes back she leans into him more. His one arm is resting on the back of the sofa and the other holds the book open on his lap. This position gives her better access to snuggle into him. He picks up that she is practically on his lap but doesn't stop it; he is sure he can keep control of the situation. Even though it is clear to anyone he has already lost it.

"Why don't we put the books away and take a break." She pushes the book off his lap; her hand slowly brushes across his legs.

"Errm okay"

"I want to thank you, for taking the time to do this. Especially as it's so late."

"It's okay, I don't mind."

They look into each other's eyes and for a moment Bonnie swears he is about to kiss her. But he doesn't. Instead he looks away and fiddles with the book thats now next to his lap; for a moment he could have sworn he was about to kiss her.

"Maybe you should go, Bonnie." He stands up, gets her bag and holds it out for her. She takes it from him and follows him to the door.

"I really do appreciate you helping me. Now I owe you three times." She touches his arm and gives him a peck on the cheek. When she draws back he can't help himself anymore; he has to try her. He darts to meet her mouth. She melts into him, immediately returning the kiss. At first he holds her face but his hands end up in around her waist pulling her closer.

Reality comes back making him push her away. He steps back touching his mouth "Okay now you really need to leave."

"But..."

"Now Bonnie, I mean it."

She shakes her head "I don't understand."

"There isn't anything to understand, it was a mistake."

"Kissing me?"

"Everything. Befriending you, driving you home, letting you come back here, all of it."

"You befriended me for a reason. I don't see you getting this close with any other student. Admit it you like me."

"There, you just said it; student. You are my student. That's why you came here, so I could teach you – and not about kissing. I'm sorry if I gave some false impression, but I don't like you, not like that, I can't."

"_You _kissed me."

He doesn't know how to reply to that one. He silently walks to the door and opens it for her.

"Ric" she whispers on the verge of crying.

"My name is Mr Saltzman."

With that she leaves. He flinches when she slams the door. He rubs his face hoping he is going to wake up from a dream. Straight away he heads for his stock of Bourbon; he has to drown his guilt from hurting her.

_**Dear Diary, (Sat 7**__**th**__** Apr) **_

_**I don't really feel like writing at the moment. But I want to make note of what just happened. I don't need to say what; I'm sure I will remember. I'm so angry. At the both of us. **_


	3. Chapter 3

Two weeks later...

Alaric hasn't seen Bonnie; she hasn't showed up for class once since that night. Bonnie hasn't seen Alaric; he hasn't come to the bar once since the incident. But today they see each other.

Bonnie wipes down the bar, the Grill is busy tonight, and she and the other bartender can barely keep up. As soon as a seat becomes available Alaric is quick to take it. She sees him but refuses to go over. He is there for ten minutes and still hasn't gotten any service.

"Bonnie! Can you get that guy over there, I'm swamped here." He points but she knows who he is referring to. She makes her way over.

"What can I get you, Mr Saltzman?" her tone is unkind.

"Bonnie...I..." he can't look at her.

"I'll bring your usual." She wanders off giving him time to regroup.

She places his glass down next to her history book that is now on the bar. "I thought you would need it – if you ever plan on attending another history lesson that is."

"Thanks" she puts in below the bar. "But I don't think I will be going back."

"You can't skip school."

"I'm not too fond of the teacher. He is a real ass."

He nods swallowing his pride "I deserve that. Can we talk properly?"

"No! I'm fed up with you guys doing or saying stupid things and then wanting to talk about it. How about you don't do it in the first place? Just forget about it."

He goes to say something but is interrupted by Damon; he squeezes in the space between Alaric and some other bloke. "Hey, Bon Bon." She rolls her eyes at his persisting annoyance.

"Damon" she acknowledges him.

"Your finest Bourbon please." She fetches it, relieved to put more distance between herself and Ric. "You're the new guy." He holds his hand out "You haven't had the pleasure of meeting me yet, I'm Damon"

"Alaric." He shakes his hand. Bonnie returns with his drink and he takes a sip.

"I see you are a fellow Bourbon drinker also. We should be Bourbon buddies." He clinks his glass with Alaric, who doesn't reply.

"Bon Bon, when-o- when are you going to let me take you out on that date?"

"You agreed to go on a date with this guy?" Alaric asks cocking an eyebrow.

"It was when he first came to town; before I developed the constant urge to punch him in the face. He's an ass. You two should get along great." She walks off to serve the other customers.

"You ever noticed how Bon Bon sounds strikingly similar to Bourbon. It makes me want her more." Damon says watching her. Alaric nudges him with his elbow not liking the way he is looking at her.

"Why don't you go try for someone else, she doesn't seem interested."

"Makes me want her even more. It's going to be so satisfying when I do get her."

"What makes you think you will?"

"Hello, look at me; she can't resist _all this_ for that much longer. Coupled with my enviable charm, she doesn't stand a chance."

Alaric stares at him bewildered and trying not to laugh a little.

"Don't worry you aren't that bad looking. You can have what I don't want." Damon says slapping him hard on the back. "Bye Bon Bon." He shouts and winks when she turns around. She looks at Ric who is staring at her. The next time she looks he is gone.

...

Pulling into her driveway she notices him leaning against her house. She gets out the car and stomps over. She tries to ignore him, even when he starts speaking. He tries to follow her into the house but she puts a hand to his chest and pushes him back.

"Bonnie, come on."

"No, I don't want you in here." She tries to shut the door on him but he pushes it back and storms in.

"Ric!"

He paces back and forth in the hallway putting his words together in his head. Bonnie folds her arms and watches him. Eventually he stops and faces her.

"Did you ever stop to think how I feel? Do you know how much trouble I could get into? I freaked out..."

"It doesn't give you the right to make me feel bad. We are as guilty as each other, Ric. You made it feel like it was _my_ fault, that it was all in my _head_."

"And I'm really sorry."

"It was obvious that I liked you; you should have said something if you were getting uncomfortable."

"But I wasn't. If I didn't want you close to me I would have moved. If I didn't want to speak to you I wouldn't have. If I didn't want you to be my friend, I wouldn't have called you one."

"I just don't understand...I'm confused about what you want."

"Right now...I just want to kiss you."

"I don't think you should."

"You don't want me to?"

"It's not that. What happens when the kiss ends, Ric?"

He doesn't reply; he can't think of a good enough answer. She shrugs suggest her point is proved then turns to the door and reaches for the handle.

"I'm not leaving." He stands firm.

"Well you can't stay."

"Who else is here?"

"No one, Grams is at her monthly weekend visit to her friend Val. But, no, that's not the point."

"I want to talk"

"Talk about what?" she shouts "What exactly do you want to talk about?"

"I don't want you to be angry with me anymore." He sounds so sad she starts to feel a little sorry for him. "I want you to understand how sorry I am, and for you to forgive me, please."

He does sound like he means it. "Okay. I forgive you. I'm sorry too; for getting so angry."

"It's all in the past."

"I just... I need you to say it; that it wasn't in my head. Did you like me?"

"I still do."

She sighs "That makes it worse."

"It does?"

"Here we are, two people attracted to each other, but nothing that we can do about it."

"You could let me kiss you. No one has to know. So we can't go out in public, doesn't mean it can't work."

She shakes her head. "You won't like it for long, Ric. Eventually you'll feel guilty and that it's wrong, and I don't want a repeat of what happened last time. We can't go past friends." She opens the door "You got what you came for...please."

He leaves.

_**Dear Diary, (Sat 21**__**st**__** Apr) **_

_**I'm having one of those moments; when you are pretty sure you did the right thing, but you regret it. I'm now debating whether or not to o back to history, on one hand I do need to catch up, on the other it means having to see him. But I guess things are sorted now, it can't be that bad. **_

_**...**_

Monday lunch time the three girls are sitting at a lunch table waiting for the bell. Bonnie is fiddling with her food rather than eating it.

"Bonnie, what's up with you?" Elena asks giving a look of concern.

"I'm fine." She shrugs.

"No you're not, you've been moping around the past couple of weeks, tell us what's wrong." Caroline argues.

"We're your best friends, you can tell us." Elena adds.

"Seriously; it's nothing. Probably just a bad few weeks, I will perk up again in no time." Her smile and tone has them convinced for now.

The bell rings. Bonnie sighs and throws her food in the bin and catches up with the other two. When leaving the room Caroline and Bonnie turn right and Bonnie turns left.

"Bonnie, you not coming to history today?"

"_Again" _Caroline mumbles.

"I am; my book is in my locker. I'll be there in a few." They nod and walk of talking.

True to her words Bonnie goes to her locker and gets her book. She makes it to the classroom but only as far as the door. The sound of his voice stops her. She hears him inquire about her absence, flinching as he speaks her name. She takes a step forward to enter but her mind changes before her foot meets the floor. She walks off hurriedly clutching the book tight to her chest.

...

Two days later, school has finished and Bonnie is making her way out of the library after missing another history class that afternoon. She is around the corner from the exit when a hand lands on her shoulder holding her still.

"You are..." he looks at the small piece of paper "Miss Bonnie Bennett, correct?" she doesn't recognise him but it seems he is part of the staff.

"Yes."

"The Head would like to see you. Now."

"But..."

"No, he would like to see you today. Do you know the way?" she doesn't answer, just walks away giving him a slight dirty look.

She knocks on the door and waits for permission to enter. The first face she sees when she pushes the door back is Ric's; he is sitting in one of the chairs facing the heads desk. She is told to take the seat next to him; to Bonnie's discomfort they are positioned quite close. She tries to act as normal as possible so leans back in the chair placing an arms on one of the arm rests.

"Do you know why I called you here, Bonnie?"

"No, Sir." She quickly glances to Ric, then back at the head.

"It has been brought to my attention that you have missed several, consecutive, history lessons. Is this true, Miss Bennett?" she nods, she knows she can't lie. "You aren't having any problems with the class are you, other students maybe?"

"No."

"If you do have any issues, tell us so we can get them sorted. But if you insist there aren't any in that department I'll have to take your word. As for your excuse for the absences I won't bother asking so long as you attend your lessons from now on."

"Okay."

"Good. Now, Mr Saltzman how do you suppose she catches up with the past few weeks."

He is a little taken off guard with the question and nothing but a few muffled sounds come out.

The Head offers his solution "How about you do some after school catch up?" He smiles in a way that says it's not really a question now hurry and leave.

"I'm not sur..." Ric tries to say before being cut off.

"And since you are both here; no time like the present."

"Actually, Sir..." Bonnie tries this time.

"No time to waste; off you pop." He smiles again.

Outside she leans against the lockers whilst he closes the door. "I'm only asking, but did you do this?"

"Tell on you? No, Bonnie, I didn't." He is a little annoyed at the accusation.

"Like I said I was only asking." She holds her arms up defensively.

"I wouldn't purposely try to get you into trouble."

"Alright, I'm sorry."

They stand awkwardly; he rubs the back of his head and she chews her lip.

"Well, I'm going home." He states walking off.

"What about the lesson?"

"I'll see you Friday morning, Bonnie." He effortlessly throws a hand up as if to wave.


	4. Chapter 4

The whole of Friday's lesson Alaric seems uncomfortable, but just enough for it to only be Bonnie to pick up on it. When the bells rings to signal lunch he dismisses the class with some relief and sinks into his chair holding his head in his hands staring into the desk. Only when the noise has dwindled into almost nothing does he looks up. He sighs and rubs his eyes leaning into his chair when he sees Bonnie still sitting in her seat. She stares at him intensely without blinking. Eventually he looks back over and meets her eye; staring her out for a moment. Finally he speaks.

"What?" he asks deflated.

She gets out of her seat and walks closer; she leans on the side of the desk opposite to him. Another short staring match ensues.

"I can't do a catch up session now."

"I'm not..."

"Why don't you come back after school?"

She feels from his tone there is no point in continuing trying to talk so gets her things and leaves. Just before she opens the door she gives one quick look back but he isn't looking at her. She worms through the people clogging the hallway and manages to make it out all the while half mindless. The fresh cool air is what brings her full attention back to the world; she looks over the scattered faces of people unable to find anyone she knows. Instead of going back inside she decides to grab an empty table on the grass.

When seated she pulls out her diary, flicks through the pages and holds her pen to the first blank one. She looks over the groups of people again and accidentally finds herself staring at the window to her history room. Upon realising she quickly snaps out of it and begins to write.

_**Dear Diary, (Fri 11**__**th**__** May) **_

_**...I'm starting to feel a little pathetic writing about Ric now; he is consuming too much of my time. I've said what I said and I meant it – or I did at the time. I think I'm kicking myself now. I would say something but he doesn't seem interested, like he is angry, at me, but I don't know what I did.**_

Matt slides along the bench on the opposite side of the table startling her. She snaps the book closed and smiles at him.

"Hey Bon." He greets.

"Where is everybody?"

"I don't know" he looks around a little "I checked the cafeteria but I didn't see them. Then I saw you. You doin' homework?" he points to the diary

"Errm...yea" she fiddles with the corners.

"You alright? Seem a bit vacant." He questions biting into his sandwich.

"I haven't eaten yet; practically starved." She pulls out her lunch from her bag. Opening the wrapping on her sandwich she looks to Matt debating whether to ask him for an opinion.

"Matt..."

"Mmmm?" he takes another bite.

"Say if..." she rethinks "Have you done something, because it was the sensible or right thing to do, but despite that wish you hadn't?"

He thinks whilst he finishes chewing "A couple times, I guess. Why?"

"Can we keep this between us?" he nods "No Elena, and especially no Caroline."

"I promise. Go on."

"Say if you wanted to change your mind, do it anyway, even though you know it's wrong. Do you think it would be so bad?"

"Depends what's at stake."

"Okay..." she thinks to try and look less suspicious. "Say, a job, for example."

"But what is the job at risk for? Something more important?" She shrugs. "Love?"

"NO" her whole body and face react, in such a way that it makes Matt jolt back a little. "Sorry...but actually, since you brought it up, sure lets go with that... for an example."

"I think a guy could get another job if he needs."

"What about reputation?"

"Well how bad are you planning on ruining it?"

"What? I'm not, example remember."

"Look Bon, whoever has the things to lose should be the one to make the decision."

She nods slowly "Right."

"Are you going to tell me what is going on now?"

"Nope." She smiles and bites into her sandwich.

Halfway through lunch Elena strolls over, throws her bag onto the table and plonks down beside Matt resting against him slightly.

"Computer stuff exhausts me." She whimpers.

"So that's where you've been hiding. Neither of us could find you." Matt says while rubbing her hunched over back.

"Here." Bonnie slides a chocolate bar across the table. "Think you need some sugar."

"Where's Caroline?"

"I left Stefan trying to help her with her computer work. I however couldn't stand one more minute in the stuffy old computer lab." Her grip tightens around the bar as she speaks.

"It's a crime to miss out on such a beautiful day." Bonnie tilts her head back feeling the sun warm her face.

"Supposed to rain later" Elena rolls her eyes and takes an angry bite into the chocolate.

"Yea, I heard that too." Matt adds.

"Since when is rain a conversation piece?" Bonnie ponders since this is the first time she is hearing about any rain.

"They say it's going to be really bad; they've given road warnings and everything."

...

At the end of the day Bonnie hugs Elena and Caroline goodbye and heads for Alaric's classroom. She knocks on the door but there is no answer. She pulls on the handle to find it is locked. Hearing someone walking behind her she turns expecting to see Ric.

"Oh, Mr Roberts; do you know where Mr Saltzman is?"

"I believe he has left for home dear. Seemed to be in a hurry too."

"Oh really."

"Perhaps he was trying to avoid the heavy rain." He says then walks off.

"He was trying to avoid something alright." She mumbles to herself. She takes a deep breath to try and calm herself but it fails. "That. Is. It!"

At the doors, it is now she notices how heavy the rain is falling; it's coming down hard and dense. A brief flashback to that night at the Grill with Ric has her frozen. But just as quick as it came she moves it out of her head. She marches forward not letting the rain stop her. By the time she gets to her car she is half soaked. She rubs her hands against the seat to try and dry them then pulls out her diary and pen.

_**Dear Diary, (Still Fri 11**__**th**__** May) **_

_**Enough is enough. I am fed up; time things are set straight. No more of the: me being angry at him, then him at me, then me at him, then him at me and so forth. I'm drenched, I'm cold and I'm angry!**_

...

Face to face with his door she knocks hard and fast, and she doesn't stop until it opens. Now she is completely soaked through and shivering; she cursed the whole distance between her car and the building for not being able to park close.

She bursts in not waiting for invitation – not waiting to see if she would get one.

"Bonnie what do you think yo..."

"What? You can burst into my place when it suits you, but I can't?"

"I mea..."

"No, I want to talk now. I am getting tired of this back and forth switching of anger. I don't know why you are so angry with me, but unfortunately I care. I want whatever this is to be sorted by the time I leave; in fact I'm not leaving until it is sorted. I don't care if we end up friends or not friends or whatever I just want there to be neutral ground, no anger." she takes a deep breath and wipes away some of the water dripping from her face.

"I'm not mad at you, Bonnie. I'm mad at the situation I've gotten myself into and that I don't know how to deal with it. I'm taking my anger _out_ on you."

"Well I'm letting you make the decision; after all it's you who has so much at risk. Either way, whatever you want; it's up to you."

He stares at her; she can see he is thinking about it. He watches the water drip from her body; her shivers making the drops break away quicker.

"I need time, to think properly."

"Fine." She walks towards him and at first he doesn't realise he is blocking the door. He grabs her arm when it comes out for the handle.

"Are you crazy you can't go out there?"

"I drove here in it."

"It's gotten worse now, somehow, and I don't want you out there. Look at you."

She looks down at herself and laughs a little imagining what she must look like from the neck up.

"Can I use your bathroom?"

He nods and she slowly makes her way over, dragging her cold and wet feet.

The first thing she does is kick her shoes off, quickly followed by her jacket. She takes a towel and dabs her face, then her arms and hair. She also wipes away the makeup that has run slightly. She immediately feels more comfortable. Holding her hands under the hot water to warm them up she feels her right hand sting; looking properly she sees that the skin along her knuckles has broken and is bleeding somewhat.

Alaric taps the door and sticks his head around to see if she is alright then disappears. When he comes back he has a t shirt and some bottoms for her to change into.

"Here, if you want them." He places them next to the sink.

"I don't suppose you have some socks you don't mind me wearing? My feet are frozen."

He smiles "Of course."

When he leaves again she removes her top and jeans and throws the wet items over the bath, then pats at her skin with the towel.

When she comes out of the bathroom she is only wearing the shirt he provided. She stands in the doorway awkwardly and trying to pull the shirt lower even though it does cover her.

"They are too big; I couldn't get them to stay up."

"Sorry, they're the smallest size I've got."

"This will do." She walks over to join him sitting at the kitchen counter. He pushes a pair of black socks to her which she then tries to elegantly put on. "Thank you."

"Is someone going to be expecting you at home? I don't want them to worry."

"I called my Grams in there; I told her I'm at Elena's. She isn't expecting me."

"Do you want something to eat?"

"Depends if what you are offering is good or not."

"I'll have you know I am a fine cook."

"Do you consider ordering take-out cooking?" she raises her eyebrows when he hesitates.

"Okay I may order a lot of take-out, but I can cook. I'll prove it." He gets from his seat and rummages through the cupboards. He commands her to stay put every time she attempts to help; so she sits and observes, occasionally mocking him. At the end of the meal she has to admit that he is quite the cook.

Its six thirty and Bonnie has just finished helping him wipe away the dishes and pans. The following hours consist of them watching some tele in somewhat awkward silence. At nine forty she falls asleep; the high emotions of today have her exhausted. When Ric notices he gently shakes her awake.

"Bonnie" he rubs her shoulder. She stirs, slowly getting her bearings again. "You can use my bed."

"No I'm fine." Its barely audible and she is asleep again as soon as the sentence ends. Ignoring her he scoops her up and carries her limp body to his room and tucks her into his bed. He shuts the door two and spends the night on sofa.

When morning comes it takes a few blinks for her to remember where she is. She quickly turns to see if he is next to her, admittedly disappointed that he isn't. Before she gets up she lingers a minute to take in the fact that she is in _his_ bed. She reads that is it 7:46 from the alarm clock then walks towards the door rubbing the sleep from her eyes. She softly pushes the door back and sees Ric's feet hanging off the sofa. His breathing suggests he is asleep so she takes care to be quiet. In the bathroom she goes for her bag that was left in there the previous evening. She shuts the door, leans against it and slides to the floor. She leans the book on her bent knees to write in it.

_**Dear Diary, (Sat 12**__**th**__** May)**_

_**Taking Matt's advice I have given Ric the choice. He says he needs time. Only I've been here all night and he hasn't said anything. The fact that he needs to think about it isn't good though is it? If he wanted it enough, or thought I was enough, he would just know. Maybe I am thinking too much of it, for all I know to him I am some silly child who he thinks is pretty. I don't want to be here when he wakes up. **_

Hurriedly she forces the diary back into her bag then gets to her feet. Her clothes are still wet and she shudders at the thought of putting them back on. Her solution is to put on the bottoms that were too big and just hold them up. She tiptoes through the apartment and stops to look at him for a long minute before leaving.

In the car she pulls out her phone and brings up her two friends names. She stares at them whilst trying to decide which one to call, and whether to call one at all. In the end she clicks on Elena and impatiently listens to the dial tone. On the fifth ring Elena answers full of morning grogginess.

"Bonnie?"

"Sorry to wake you, can I come over?"

"Is everything okay?"

"I just need to talk."

"Of course you can come over."

"See you in a minute." She hangs up.

...

Elena has the door open before Bonnie is on the path. She hugs her then pulls back looking her over.

"What on earth are you wearing?"

"It's all part of the story." They go to Elena's room and Bonnie tells her pretty much everything, not giving any names away or specific details, but enough. She feels like a weight is lifted by the time she has finished, even breathing a sigh of relief.

"Wow. Did you know it was 12 o'clock?" Bonnie asks gawping at her watch.

"Really?" Elena comes back in from the bathroom and even checks a clock on her chest of draws to make sure.

"I better get going; I have a shift starting at three and I want a quick nap before I go in." She climbs of the bed and picks up her things.

"Wait." Elena goes into her closet and pulls out a pair of jeans then throws them over to Bonnie. "It might have been okay at eight this morning, but people are awake now and no one should be seen like that."

...

At home Bonnie rushes up to her room and dives onto her bed face down. She falls asleep in this position surprisingly still tired. An hour later the alarm she set on her phone jingles, she props herself up on her elbows, rubs her eyes then shuffles into her bathroom. Her shower lasts over thirty minutes; she has been waiting for it since she got soaked yesterday. When out, she towel dries her hair 70%, so it will set into its natural curls, then dries then her body. She gets into her uniform; she feels like wearing the blue Mystic Grill top today and on the bottom she picks a black body-con skirt. She pays special attention to her make-up; she has a feeling that she will be running into Ric at some point and she wants to look nice. When done she checks the time and sees she is running a tad behind so quickly dries the last bit of dampness in her hair with the hairdryer. She takes a glance in the mirror, approves, then reaches for her phone that bleeps as she picks it up. Reading Damon's name makes her eyes roll.

'_Hey Bon Bon, you working today?" _She ignores it, places it into her handbag, gabs her apron and leaves.

...

"Oh. My. God. Are you kidding me?" Bonnie complains.

"What?" Damon frowns.

"You can't work here!"

"Of course I can. Don't I look great in this uniform?" he twirls and lifts an eyebrow waiting for her to answer. She walks off shaking her head.

At six Bonnie moves around the bar sorting things behind it and one point when she turns around Damon is sitting on a stool in front of her on the other side; she jumps a little.

"Don't you have work to be doing?" she squeezes the words though a clenched jaw.

"I'm taking a break." He shrugs. "Bourbon please"

"I can't serve you while you are working." She smiles knowing that was bound to sting; his expression proves it.

"What!" he growls.

"Sorry" she sings.

He slumps forward onto the bar resting a chin on a palm. "You didn't answer my text earlier."

"I wish I had."

"Why's that?"

"Because if you had told me you were working here I would have called in sick."

"Oh come on, Bon Bon. I'm a waiter and you're behind the bar, we won't see each other _that _much." He takes a gulp of water as if it was Bourbon and his face turns sad missing the taste. "Besides, the more time you spend with me the more you will grow to love me, I bet." He smiles leaving the bar. For some reason she doesn't know it brings a genuine smile to her face. Maybe it was his tone or expression but he didn't seem so cocky when saying it.

Half an hour later Bonnie leans on the bar flicking through a magazine; it hasn't started to get too busy yet. At one point she casually takes a quick look around the room and her eyes freeze on Ric. He is just coming in and doesn't appear to have seen her yet so she turns back to the magazine and acts natural.

"Not avoiding me now?"

"Huh?" she still flicks through her magazine not looking up to him.

"This morning"

"Oh right. I wasn't avoiding you; I woke up early and didn't want to bother you so I left." Her eyes move to see if he is buying it.

"Yea right." He sits on a stool.

"Have you had enough time?"

"Yes" he chokes on the word.

She sighs,"You don't want to do you?"

"Eric!" Ric jolts forward when Damon slaps him on the back.

"It's Alaric, Duncan." He tosses Damon a look as he sits next to him.

"_Very _funny." He widens his eyes to exaggerate his tone and slaps him on the back again making Ric flinch "See I knew we were going to be friends."

"We're friends now?"

"Sure, now were sharing jokes" he smiles. Ric looks at Bonnie and she nods to say _'Yes, this is happening'._

"Okay" he says choosing the easy way.

"I'm going for a break, give you two some time alone" Bonnie interrupts then walks off after placing Ric's Bourbon on the bar. He takes a sip; Damon's eyes follow the glass longingly.

"You know, Ric, friends share their drinks." This causes him to receive a confused and creeped-out look from him. He walks off – after finishing the glass; which Damon picks up and inhales once he is gone.

...

Bonnie turns when she hears the side door of the Grill open and then close behind her.

"Oh, I thought you were Damon." She relaxes against the wall.

"Not a disappointment am I?" he walks close to her, stopping an arm's length away.

"You know you aren't, Ric." She doesn't say anything, wanting him to just tell her and get it over with. She has to wait a while.

"I came here...tonight...because...I wanted to tell you I don't want to take the risk." Her head falls back against the wall with closed eyes at the word don't. She doesn't feel him take a step closer. "I think I changed my mind though." Her eyes open immediately, and wide.

"But you understand what you are risking?"

"I've been thinking about it all day, I know. You are the only person I'm close to here, excluding the beautiful friendship I have just started with Damon of course, and let's face it, we aren't going to be friends are we, I know I can't _just_ be your friend_." _He shrinks the last few inches between them by taking another small step which she responds to by straightening up.

It seems like he is about to kiss her but she isn't sure; he seems to just look at her for a moment then reaches out to put a hand through her and she isn't sure if he is stalling. However, when his hand gets to the base of her neck he leans in and at first she thinks she is seeing things in slow motion he moves so slowly. It is much better than the first kiss they had, this one is more relaxed and she isn't taken by surprise. She knows she is going to be smiling for the rest of the evening.


End file.
